For me, it can be easy to hope for the best in others. Even if they are someone who I choose not be around, I still wish for their happiness and well-being. Honestly, the planet does not need any more toxic unhappiness, so another being does not need my approval in order for me to wish them peace and happiness. I try to walk my talk by living with an energetic awareness that takes responsibility for what I project – and resonate with – into the world and universe.
I try to be mindful of the possible effects that my energy has on the environment in which I reside. For me, intention is of significant importance. Even when we fail to execute our intentions, we can succeed at healing and growth as long as we are sincere and centered in loving kindness. Even if we question what compassion feels or looks like, we can open our hearts to allowing for the experience. If we are genuine in our desires for equanimity and acceptance; compassion, empathy, and loving kindness will follow.
When it comes to deciding who we are willing to share experience and relationships with, intention can be a real game changer for me. Nobody is perfect. However, when one is centered in loving kindness, it is usually much easier to accept and forgive imperfections – starting with our own selves.
How do we evaluate intentions? First, remember that evaluation is not the same as justice. Energetically, there are nuances, vibrations, and a multitude of visceral reactions. Behaviorally, I observe whether actions are aligned with what is being said. I open intuitively and ask for clarity. I seek to observe without judgment. That includes expanding beyond preconceived notions about right and wrong, whether I am deserving and worthy, and trusting what I am sensing in addition to what I am seeing and hearing.
I am reminded of the old fable regarding a wolf in sheep’s clothing. The wolf dresses as a sheep in order to invade the flock for its personal gain. There are times when another is intentionally misrepresenting himself or herself as something they are not. In these instances, there can be a predatory intention. The costume may portray kindness, sensitivity, and caring, but the intentions are driven by possession and taking whatever they can get. Energetically, these types of people are saying one thing while doing another. Passive aggressive behavior is a good example of one who does not walk her or his talk.
Optimism in the name of acceptance can quickly become denial of what’s standing in front of us. Instead of observing, we justify what we perceive in order to avoid potential suffering. Sometimes, we are naïve. Other times, we may be ignoring an inner voice because we just don’t want to have to deal with the consequences of reality. Maybe we don’t trust ourselves enough. Or, we may not have enough information or experience to adequately evaluate. Regardless, if we try to be mindful, we can create space for honest observation and clarity.
I think it’s important to be honest. Persons whose intentions are centered in compassion, empathy, peace, and loving kindness support empowerment not diminishment, power-over, and taking whatever they can get. Acceptance is a root of forgiveness, self-respect, and gentle kindness. Disrespect is a root of insecurity, illusionary power, and oppression. Mindfulness asks us to observe with compassion. Gentle compassion requires honesty, openness, and clarity.
Compassionate observation asks us to open our hearts to the present. Being mindful asks us to step into the now. Not the past or the future. We can only be present if we allow our awareness to see beyond the illusions of what we hope for and fear. That means compassion, peace, and empathy for all not just those who seem well-intended. We can recognize that we can be centered in loving kindness and still see the wolf hiding in sheep’s clothing (or the reverse when another is well-intended but triggering our baggage). We can respect ourselves by letting go of a need to view others – and our own selves – through rose colored glasses. We can choose empowering and supportive relationships and not mistake the costume for what’s underneath.