I recently read a comment by someone that had just purchased a magnet that had the phrase: LET GO OR BE DRAGGED. I have a variety of reactions to the phrase. First, it resonates truth with me. As I frequently present, being able to respond appropriately (i.e., take genuine responsibility) embodies being proactive regarding one’s process of personal growth and self awareness. In order to avoid the cosmic 2 x 4 of being jolted into reality, I think being proactive and taking genuine responsibility is easier than having to deal with the stress of crisis. Even when crisis does come our way, as it does for everyone, our reaction is more likely to be tempered with compassion, patience, and tolerance when we practice the art of letting go.
Another perspective, is that there have been times in my life where I feel that I am being “dragged” along due to an attempt to conform to another person’s, culture or society’s perceived ideas. During times like these, I experience a different kind of anxiety and lack of peace. Sometimes, it is like a small nagging feeling, but mostly it’s a genuine disruption due to being thrown off center and out of balance. For I know that if I am ignoring my soul self, that my personality and ego self are dragging along in an attempt to feel loved and accepted by another. It is a path that leads to insecurity, reactivity, and lack of confidence. Instead of nurturing trust and faith in myself and my abilities, I know, even if only on a subconscious level, that something is off. In addition, attempting to conform to an outside agenda, opens the doors wide to energetic intrusion in a manner than encourages us to give control to something other than our authentic selves.
The times in my life when I felt the most strongly pulled to conform to an outside agenda are mainly in my past. In particular, when I look back on my history of relationships, I can see that those that left me longing for a greater sense of self, were the ones where another did not support my growth and authentic self. Their agenda was to diminish their own emotional discomfort by attempting to encourage me to take care of them in some manner that was primarily a one way flow. Energy from me to them, with very little support from them to me. Again, let go or be dragged comes to mind because I can choose to let go of my past and diminish my ability to drag myself down due to stirrings of insecurity and doubts. Or, I can genuinely let go and free myself to trust, empower, strengthen, and center in loving kindness. I can forgive myself by remembering that my history is part of my life path and not an opportunity to pull myself backwards. As Maya Angelou says: “When we know better, we do better.” Also, I can remember that I was not the sole party responsible. It takes two to tango, and just because another holds me responsible (i.e., blaming), doesn’t make it true.
Sometimes, it can be tricky to evaluate whether the source encouraging conformity is coming from within or externally. In my experience, intuition will guide us and inform us as to whether the insecurities are an opportunity to learn more about our own fears and doubts, or whether they are a response to another’s requests that we are sensing yet not fully conscious of. For example, in many of my previous relationships, when I presented the opportunity for growth and change, it was met with resistance. The kind of resistance that does not allow room for my own movement. This in turn creates a nagging feeling that something is off. Here’s a tip: If you want to get a glimpse of where another is truly at with you, just say “no” and observe what happens. The absence of flexibility and acceptance serve as a warning to keep my boundaries in place and to not allow myself to be swept away in a one way flow of giving. When I do start to float towards another’s manipulation, my intuition and the universe gently attempt to nudge me into the present and to hear my authentic self. I can listen, do the work that I need to do in order to let go, or I can ignore my inner voice until it is shouting at me by creating life stressors, drama, and crisis. I’ve been down both roads. No doubt, I’d rather heed the heads up than wait for a screaming blow that crashes down my illusions. Plus, the more we ignore our intuitive self, the greater the vulnerability and abundance of energetic intrusions that confuse us by adding to the chorus inside our head. Excuse the language, but I refer to these circumstances as a “cluster f#@*!” The various energies feed one another making it more and more challenging to hear the more subtle voices of intuition. In turn, the clean up effort can be massive on all levels; physically, psychically, and energetically.
Naturally, in an ideal, blissful, and euphoric world, I would be so tuned into my intuition and soul self that I wouldn’t even need to let go. I would always be centered and stand strongly positioned in genuine power which eliminates the need to be dragged. Alas, I know this is not to be for I am human. So, I do the best I can to follow my heart, soul, and intuition. I do what I can to move forward and foster loving kindness knowing that “Let Go Or Be Dragged” is going to manifest in my life whether I want it to or not.